......? i dunno

Am wondering if i should start anew and hope the pain erase or wait and mature till am ready... i dunno i feel so confuse. I still dont trust ppl as much but i also been feeling lonely. Sigh getting stabbed hearts but does reviving a heart hurts more or make it stronger. Am afraid of making the same mistakes but i feel maybe i should try???. Why is this so hard? Maybe am just gong to fast, yea i'll just wait out and hopefully time will tell me how to do it while and working out the problems on the side. lately i've been beating up my self self being envious of some people, wishing to look better or improve something about me. I dunno i feel so ugly and horrible inside and out. I want to change but am afraid for the worst will come to me. One baby step at a time i guess and then the big step for being free. Anyone please pray for me. And thanks myles for keeping me smiling even though its been short you still mange to break that wall and push my buttons lol.

On a another Note its so sad to see girls lose there hearts to jerks and there virginity but keep string girls. just know that things may never be forever but a new rose is willing to grow.