V-i-o-l-a-t-e-d

Tonight i feel disgusted, uncomfortable and ashame. I had just walk halfway with my new friend jenny. I said my goodbyes and left towards my home. I stop by my favorite gym to say my hi's and small chit chat with my favorite clients and trainer. Seeing that the time was 9:45 i decided it was time for me to head home quickly before my mother called. As i cross the street to ready to pass the restaurant on the corner a familiar face that i tried to aviod appear since it was for him to close the shop. I had a gut feeling that i should just keep on going and my mind screaming ignore him. But i didn't listen. He called me before closing down the last grate and stop me from my final destination. Being a kind person i told him hello and am in a hurry to get home. knowingly that he's p resistant he keep pushing say its urgent we talk and it wouldn't take no time. I reminded him my mom await my arrival home , he said quickly come in the shop, i ask him why we can't talk out side? rushing me he said just get in, i can't leave the store this way. ......so i was in (thinking regrettably) . So he confronts me saying how he knew me for years since i move in and had always like me and wanted me to give it up to him. But i told him am not interested and am celibate trying to get him to give up. Each and every time i see him i always ignore his advances and denied him when i could. He not the type to take no for an answer. He was upset with my answer but went back to his true agenda. He told me to go in to the restroom and i refuse, he said just get in there shoving me in there. i was scared and it was late.My friend jenny called my cell and i knew it was her trying to tell me she made it home safely (to which i should of been home by then) Quickly i told him it was my mother calling me and i needed to speak to her. He said don't answer the phone and that this would be quick and i can go join her.


Quickly he try to lift up my shirt and refusing i tried to pull it down. Getting a little frustrated he started to use his strength and at the same time he ask me why i hide my body and that am very f**kable. Then while he took my breast in his mouth he tried to open up my pants and i trying to push him away and keep my pants up. I told him repeatedly no, i don't want to do this and my mom is going to look for me. He kept ignoring me and try to force his hand inside and forcibly tried to put his fingers in, it was painful and i quickly move my body from him. Took out his hand and quickly tried to close up my pants but he wasn't giving up easily he try to kiss (slobber) on my neck behind me and i try to angle my head where wouldn't be space for him to be on my neck and then he tried biting on my ear that it hurt and i flinch but he took it as the wrong body language and thought i enjoyed it. Then he place his hands around my neck under my chin controlling my head. I told him no again and still ignoring my request. He said Don't you like it aggressive , i know this feel good so stop trying to fight it. I reply no and struggle to get out his grasp. And yelled No and he lift my chin up with his choke hold ( it was on my neck but he did not squeeze).He tried to kiss me and i tried to keep my mouth close as he try to force his tongue or lick anywhere he could on my face.

Then he tried again to pull down my pants and he had his already out. i repeated no and tried to push him away from me. He said let me put it in side, i told him i wasn't on no birth control and never been tested.He ask if i had any condom and to give it to him i replied no then forcibly he try to bend me over the toilet and say let me put it in your ass and i said no kicking him back and quickly pulled up my pants and said i need to go home and i want to go home. Frustrated that he couldn't get what he wanted he started to stimulate him self and told me to get on my knees, i refuse again . He said just touch it and rub and i refuse again. He tried pulling on my hand to grasp his private area, I was easily disgusted and wanted to pull my hand away. He then tried to reach for my head and said suck it , am not telling you what you want to do , am telling you to do it. I was scared and backed away from him and pull back my hand. ...Then there was some banging noise in the shop out side the restroom. I told him someone was here and to let me go , Trying to ignore the sound he said no one is here. But the noise was constant since the whole time before it was empty and silent. As he went out to investigate the sound, I quickly left after him and out the restaurant and walked fast home. Behind me he yelled call him and stop ignoring him.

Just as I reached my door, my mother called my cell and yelling what was taking so long and take out the garbage and put away the food and quickly hung up the phone. I was scared to tell her what happen I wanted to but she wouldn't understand and her action to take scared me what will she do. ( knowing her she probably confront the man and threat him then call authority). Soon as I reach in the house , my phone rang, I wasn't in the mood to talk with anyone. Again my phone rang and I remember earlier i had a miss call from jenny, unsure of the number i answered thinking it was her. It was him ....Sherwon. He asked why I treated him that way and he always like me and why i didn't want to give it up to him. I told him no I didn't want any of that and am not interested and I don't want to talk to him. He replied he'll give me time to when i wanted to give it up to him and stop treating him like a stranger. I hung up and quickly place his number on straight to voice-mail and hope never to speak to him.

Then I felt sick, felt uncomfortable, disgusted and shocked from what happen. I felt dirty , from everywhere he touched and the pain from when he try to placed his fingers in. I quickly took off my clothes and went to the shower. Having the water on its hottest I wanted to burn off everywhere he touched. I got in the hot shower and then my mom stop by in the bathroom to use it and she said surprised i was taking a shower tonite and not my usual morning shower. She said i guess you want to go to school early and went back to bed. I didn't say a word or think about anything. I submerge my self in hot water. I felt i wasn't clean enough and got a hard scrub and scrub my skin everywhere and as hard as i could. It burned with the hot water but I didn't care. I just wanted to wash away his existence. And I brush my teeth( i don't brush my teeth before bed) cause i remember when he try to kiss me , Brushing hard for 30 mins and made one of my gums bleed from the hard brush pressure.

I wanted to make sure there was any evidence of him on me.It was such a disgusting and disturbing feeling. When I got out the shower my skin was red from scrubbing hard and that pain still remain down there. Quickly I got dressed and set up my bed on the couch, I wanted to sleep off everything that happen so I took a 3mg Melatonin to help me sleep because i knew i wouldn't be able to sleep. Then i sat in my bed wrote on my facebook i felt uncomfortable and disgusted just to get the words out of my head and went to my blog site to type this up cause this was the only way for me to ever get out what happen. I know i wouldn't say anything to anybody in person about it anytime soon because am scared of them going to ridicule me for not taking action and causing dramatic events. While writing i got drowsy and the next day (today 3-25-11) I finished writing this.

If any female reading this , If something like this happens to you don't do what i do, just take action. I just need to build up enough courage to do so.