A promise is a BS in my life

I learn another thing about my self that i hate promises now. All my life people promises me things and i gain disappointment and lies in the end. when you feed me a promise i hold on as if its the truth of the bible. I begin to hope more for it and dream it would happen see it at the goal. but then that person cuts there end and things fall apart from me and am in denial of it ever happening and i fall deep in disappear and see that hope is all lost. Its hurts me more then things i know have. I begin to doubt things and see reality is a bitch a world i refuse to acknowledge. How can i defeat this but to stop believing in people bull. i keep my hopes and my strength high and its drops when a end is broken. when i was young i was always told that i'll get to see my father... when was that time coming, or when that person say" ill get you this or one day we'll go there" i still wait, or that love can bloosm to a long thing but never last and in the end i see that am still hoping. i want to stop believing and being fed of hope or else i will cling on. dont hurt me by filing me with lies.

green me keep your promise or don't fill me with lies