I Can't...

Tell me why i shouldn't do anything stupid?

I feel like i've drop to that low point again. Tell me why i shouldn't do something that means losing everything. When it hurt so much you really don't care for anything or how it would affect others. As selfish as it may sound i want to be put out of my misery. I lost another friend, I've fail my probation period in college which means i flunk out of college, I live with a mom who loves to control me, and only hope is to gain every cent out of me until am no longer useful. I am questionable whether to trust someone i like and my job training is going under budget cuts which means including my pay. I am constantly stress and my hair fall out everyday. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know how to get out.

I want to leave my home but i have no money and am scared knowing what may happen. I really don't know what my support is anymore.Am not in control of my house and may never will be. There just going to be that someone or that something that just manage to bring me down to hell. They say a Pisces will do anything to escape reality and am in between am just don't want to wait to leave reality. I can't say that i love to live i really don't but i try and try everyday to have some faith or some hope that i can move on and take charge but...Slowly am losing faith...Slowly am doubting hope and Slowly i find more reason why i be better...Off.

Just give me a few stupid reason why i shouldn't be a [An hero] who's weak minded and can't even stand on her two feet.