What am i doing?, what do i look for? many answers for my self i don't get why find your self if you can create one? won't that give you the power or a gift your proud of doing.? Green me!!!

some lyrics came across how i feel sometimes these past times.

UB 40- don't break my heart

You shoot me down in flames
you put me down a lot

I'm giving you my heart
go on
take it.
Please be careful not to break it
just remember:
It's the only one I've got
it's the only one I've got.
Don't break my heart - don't break my heart -
don't break my heart.

You make me laugh a lot and buy me silly things.
And I'd rather be with you than anyone else.
But if you make me mad
but if you make me mad

You'll wish that you had not
you'll wish that you had not.
Don't break my heart - don't break my heart -
don't break my heart.

Where are the roses and whispered sighs?
Where are the compliments and dreaming eyes?
It doesn't matter you see
I know you love me;
Real basic love never dies.
Don't break my heart - don't break my heart -
don't break my heart.

Where are the roses and whispered sighs? . . .
Don't break my heart - don't break my heart -
don't break my heart

another song

from toni braxton


"Un-break My Heart"

Don't leave me in all this pain
Don't leave me out in the rain
Come back and bring back my smile
Come and take these tears away
I need your arms to hold me now
The nights are so unkind
Bring back those nights when I held you beside me

Un-break my heart
Say you'll love me again
Undo this hurt you caused
When you walked out the door
And walked out of my life
Un-cry these tears
I cried so many nights
Un-break my heart
My heart

Take back that sad word good-bye
Bring back the joy to my life
Don't leave me here with these tears
Come and kiss this pain away
I can't forget the day you left
Time is so unkind
And life is so cruel without you here beside me

Un-break my heart
Say you'll love me again
Undo this hurt you caused
When you walked out the door
And walked out of my life
Un-cry these tears
I cried so many nights
Un-break my heart
My heart

Don't leave me in all this pain
Don't leave me out in the rain
Bring back the nights when I held you beside me

Un-break my heart
Say you'll love me again
Undo this hurt you caused
When you walked out the door
And walked out of my life
Un-cry this tears
I cried so many, many nights
Un-break my

Un-break my heart oh baby
Come back and say you love me
Un-break my heart
Sweet darlin'
Without you I just can't go on
Can't go on....

thats all i want to post for now

FML Three (to be cont.)

Great day to have your boyfriend break up with you and not understand you, your old friend wanting to commit suicide because of her abusive boyfriend and your mother to be very sick only to forget her medicine at the counter at a close 24/7 CVS store oh not to mention a confuse best friend who love and hate my male pal who has a girlfriend he doesn't love with his buddy feeling pressure from him to lose his virginity and to the girl that love him want him to lose his virginity to him also have my other best friend worry about her relationship to her boyfriend with a controlling family and my mother who feels i dont do much to help her in anyway while knowing that when i go to school am failing Spanish and reading a confusing book for English and laggin in my mathematical skills and having an old friend feel am not trusting because the day i wen tot the doctor and they gave me the gas i slip to a friend on the phone about her being pregnant and noticing her boyfriend another old friend give me ingorning vibes while his best friend who i compete for the title of green tutoring me in math for a SAT In Two weeks time to find out am slow in math and that i suck. Best part yet i got my encouraging grandma preventing me from leaving my mother and a ex-alcoholic uncle still drink once in awhile.With the fact that am worrying about getting in college since my applications were delay and i cant get a job. Wow my life is like so F***king amazing. Green me!!!

FML Twice

Words in my life could never explain i feel or went through.
Why does it have to be hard to explain to people about my self or to get them to understand. but then you see only yourself can know this feelings so why you cant share it with others. In life obstacles are put out for you to take down but then why cant you go around it? He see's what i go through and kinda gets what am saying but yet he just doesnt get what am coming from or wha am trying to tell him.

In existentialism the answers are beyond death but when i think that what are the answers i yearn for. i try to look past the neagativity or my life but i felt that it pulls me in to place. What is true happiness? he said only when you find your self and true happiness i'll come back to you but that make no sense since in life happiness comes with a price and when that price is given up whats there left then happinss.

am doing an experiment to vent out my toughts online i have but always miss the oppounity to vent or say what i want and could never say it again.